Parents Are too Permissive with Their Children Nowadays
The child' s happiness is al I-important, the psychologists say, but what about the parents' happiness? Parents suffer constantly from fear and guilt while their children gaily romp about pulling the place apart. A good old-fashioned spanking is out of the question: no modern child-rearing manual would permit such barbarity. The trouble is you are not allowed even to shout. Who knows what dccp psychological wounds you might inflict? Certainly a child needs love, and a lot of it. But the excessive permissiveness of modern parents is surely doing more harm than good.
Lax authority over the years makes adolescent rebellion against parents all the more violent. If the young people are going to have a party, for instance, parents are asked to leave the house. Their presence merely spoils the fun. What else can the poor parents do but obey?
Children are hardy creatures (far hardier than the psychologists would have us believe) and most of them survive the harmful influence of extreme permissiveness which is the normal condition in the modern household. But a great many do not. The spread of juvenile delinquency in our own age is
largely due to parental laxity.
The psychologists have much to answer for. They should keep their mouths shut and let parents get on with the job.And if children are knocked about a little bit in the process, it may not really matter too much. At least this will help them to develop vigorous views of their own and give them something positive to react against. Perhaps there's some truth in the idea that children who' ve had an excess of happiness in their childhood fail to make a success of life.
心理学家们说孩子的幸福是至关重要的，那么，父母们的幸福又如何呢?当孩子们欢蹦乱跳地嬉戏玩耍把家里闹个底儿朝天时，他们的父母却忍受着担心和负疚的折磨。要想像前人一样狠狠地揍他一顿屁股是根本不可能的了，因为现代育儿指南绝不会允许这种野蛮行径。麻烦的是，甚至连大声吼他一顿也不可以。谁能说清你这一吼会给孩子造成多么深的心灵创伤呢?诚然，孩子们需要爱，许许多多的爱，但是现代父母过度的娇纵绝对是弊大于利。
多年来父母的权威松懈，年少的孩子们的反抗则愈加强烈了。举个例子说吧，当年轻人聚会时，父母便被要求离开家，因为他们在场只会扫了大家的玩兴。这些可怜的父母们除了乖乖地听从还能做什么呢?
孩子是一种强壮的生物，远比心理学家告诉我们的要强壮。过度娇纵孩子已经成为现代家庭中一种很普遍的现象，而大多数孩子能克服其不良影响而成长起来。但是也有相当数量的孩子未曾幸免。当今社会，青少年犯罪问题的日益严峻，在相当大的程度上正是由于父母管教不力所致。
心理学家应当对此负相当大的责任。他们应当闭上嘴巴，让父母们自主地管教孩子。如果在这个过程中，父母对孩子稍微粗暴了一点，那其实也没有什么大不了。至少，这有助于他们培养自己坚定的主张，并给他们提供对具体事情做出反应的机会。有一种观点认为，在孩童时代享受过多幸福的孩子，创造不出成功的人生。此话或许不无道理。
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